Of course the best way to protect yourself from emotional abuse in a relationship is to leave it and find a better one.

Most individuals are unable to muster the courage to do this for many reasons that involve fear. I have written about this in another article (i.e. Relationships: The Fear Of Letting Go Of A Bad Relationship).

One of the reasons why an individual is a) hurt by such emotional abuse and b) has trouble leaving the relationship in the first place is that deep down they "believe" what is being thrown at them by their abuser.

Now I know that some of you may not only find this hard to believe you may also find it to be an offensive statement. It isn't meant to be.

Let me explain what I mean.

Suppose, for instance, you are a man and someone came up to you and said "You're a woman", would you be offended or hurt? Well unless you feel unsure about your own sexuality, and some do, you would find such a statement totally laughable, wouldn't you?

You would likely think that the person who uttered such a statement about you was totally confused.

So what does that say? Well it says that you "know" with 100% certainty that you are not a woman. Hence the insinuation that you are, to you, is totally ridiculous.

Now suppose someone came up to you and said "You're stupid". If you know with 100% certainty that you are not stupid you would also find this laughable.

Now I know that the reaction of most people to such a statement about them would be met with either slight or great offense. They might feel hurt, angry, annoyed, and might even get violent.

Why is that, well as I said it is because they, at some level also believe it about themselves. What happens when someone else says it to them is that it opens up an old deep wound that then creates a deep feeling of emotional pain. Their reaction is simply their feeble attempt to quench that pain.

Such deep wounds are the result of similar earlier childhood trauma when they in an effort to survive or be loved by older authority figures allowed themselves to be seduced into believing such negativity about themselves (see my article "Emotional Landmines").

So here is the initial root of the belief so to speak.

The truth, whether you accept it or not is that you are not and never were stupid! If you have trouble believing that then my point is made!

What's more if you have a hard time believing that its because you are carrying the trauma I mentioned above.

Did you know that such trauma and hence such feelings about one's self can be permanently erased from ones life?

What impact does this have? Well it leaves you completely resilient to such trauma in future!

By completely resilient I mean something like this:

You feel in the midst of such abuse absolutely calm, neutral, at peace, confident, joyful, happy, content, strong, invincible, focused, clear, and even humored. Whats more you are free to leave it behind, which is what Im sure you wish to do, correct?

Is that worth anything to you?

If so and you would like to know how to improve your life and your relationships then kindly visit the web link below where you may arrange an introductory telephone consultation with me.